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| konij_ntje |
Tags: Dudley (DY)
Dear mini-Kon
Wow; you have just finished you GCSEs, and you should know that you have done fine; not Oxbridge brilliant, but more than good enough to do what you are planning and complete what you are thinking.
You are about to take a major step in your life; there are some small groups of people that you have already told, and now, all but ten years later, this number will have increased more than 1000 fold; you should have Pride in yourself man; its not particularly good for someone in your shoes to be feeling that ashamed of yourself!
Ignore those fuckwits at schol; they do not know what they are talking about, and heck, when you do bump into them as an out and proud gay man, they will turn around and say that they didnt really mean what they said! How bloody stupid of them; they mocked the different, the "weak", the fat and the ugly...
And, different you ARE! This is not a bad thing at all; you are a unique soul with unique abilities and a unique view of the world around you. And there are people that love you for this, but do not let them exploit you. You will lose the man you currently admire under something tragic, but it will bring you closer to yourself. You will lose the next man you believe love and withdraw yourself from the world. You will lose the next man you like, but you will be lucky to get him back.
Above these tragedies, you will find the guy that is right for you; but for the love of God (who is also still important to you) take it slowly! Don't allow yourself to rush into things with him; he wil help slow you down, but you must take some of the onus on yourself. Don't just allow him to provide all of the strength; you are just as strong and just as worthy of him as he is of you. Heck, this might be the man you chose to marry; you choose to actually love and have it reciprocated! He means as much to you as you do yourself, and you mean the same to him.
Through all of this, you will be stronger; with a good group of friends, and a wonderful partner by your side, you are looking forward to your next birthday.
Three things I will leave you with before I go; although you believe you mess up your university life, you have actually made strong ties with some important people, and have soem good links with people who will help you far into your future. Secondly, new opportunities always arise for those that seek them; try and grasp forward to a positive change! And finally... well little guy, there will be a major thing affect your life and the lives of those important to you; I would suggest you read up on "Asperger's symdrome"...
Sorry if this is a bit cryptic for you man - but you know about causality and all that jazz! (that is caUSal, not caSUal!!! you will make that mistake for some time 
)
I love you now, in your naievity, in your form and thoughts. You will change, as it is inevitable, btu these changes will be for the better; you will grow and learn and alot of things that are positive.
I hope these words will help in some way. maxi-Kon
| 2 May 09, 7:09 PM Butterscotch UK(RM), 3 yrs  |
Excellent post, go you! | |
| 3 May 09, 12:58 AM Miss_Simone UK(CB), 5 yrs |
Fab blog, I found it very moving. Love your main pic on here, can I nab it to use as background for Windows please? Simone (a fellow sapiosexual aspie) =^_^= SIMONE =^o^= | |
| 3 May 09, 12:59 AM konij_ntje UK(B), 3 yrs |
of course Love is pain, and the Subbie forges strength from pain! | |
| 6 May 09, 4:15 PM Miss_Amanda UK(TF), 3 yrs |
Reaches up on tippy toes and..huggs you..you are a lovely man and a wonderful human being. Miss Amanda |
