"The lady doth protest too much" (37)

Do you mind if your submissive partner protests against commands, refuses to do something straight away and is reluctant and unwilling to obey orders?

Do you always except immediate obedience in all things?

Alternately, are you fine with your sub protesting as long as the eventually do as they're told?

Can it make a scene more hot and arousing if your play partner/sub really makes a fuss about it (crying for example) before finally submitting?

Does it make their 'submission' even more delightful if they're not willing to do it first of all?

Or does protesting not count as submission?

Do you enjoy it when a submissive/bottom complains, protests and is reluctant within a humiliation scene? What type of humiliation scene creates that reaction most, do you find?

To all submissives and bottoms, I ask the following questions:

Do you ever protest when your Dom/me asks you to do something either in a play situation or out of it?

Are your limits ever gently pushed much to your reluctance?

Have you been punished for refusing to do something? If so, were you more obedient the next time you received the same commant?

Is there anything in particular that makes you protest more often than usual when asked to do it?

Are you more reluctant and unwilling in humiliation scenes?

Do you dislike yourself for not being completely obedient at all times? Or is it completely acceptable to you because submission does not equal being a doormat?

That's enough questions for now, methinks!

I can't wait to go to the opening night of Club Crimson on April 18th!

Yes... I do... but I think it's generally when I'm shy or nervous about something. Like begging; it's kind of compulsive.

~Are your limits ever gently pushed much to your reluctance?~

I'm not sure where my limits are... I think my Sir tends to try and tease things out of me, rather than push me; as of yet anyhow.

~Have you been punished for refusing to do something? If so, were you more obedient the next time you received the same commant?~

No... I don't think so.

~Is there anything in particular that makes you protest more often than usual when asked to do it?~

Probably wearing the ball gag with the holes in it... I find it really embarassing to drool all over the place, but Sir seems to love it

~ Are you more reluctant and unwilling in humiliation scenes? ~

I think so... but then it's dawning on me that I think I *like* it lol.

~ Do you dislike yourself for not being completely obedient at all times? Or is it completely acceptable to you because submission does not equal being a doormat?~

Submission certainly doesn't mean being a doormat; if it did, it wouldn't have much of an appeal to me as I could never be that kind of person. 'Doormats' to me, are the type of people who get treat badly by others and allow it to happen and that isn't or shouldn't be Ds.

I get frustrated at myself for not being able to be naturally good all the time, but the more I feel able to submit, the less it seems to happen, so I guess it's more about me accepting my submission and knowing it's what Sir wants from me.

Sometimes I think it can be hard to believe that the thing I think I've tried to suppress and ignore, either because the people I were with just weren't capable of being dominant to me or because I wasn't convinced that a relationship where the 'balance' was more asymmetric, or even more traditional in the male-dominated sense, was acceptable. I now know different, but it can feel a bit like.... 'you really like me all submissive? honest? and we can have this *all* the time? really?!'... whilst I get used to it. And I am loving learning more and accepting more each day

Edited 31 Mar 09, 5:40 PM by Sirs_Froglet

It's up to the Dom in my opinion not to ask the Submissive to do anything they would not do, I'm not saying I have never asked a submissive to do something they wouldn't do, but I have realised from the time when I did it was a mistake and came close to fucking up the dynamics involved in a D's relationship.

No.

Edited to add that during a scene I would expect things to be done immediately, but again it is up to the top not to ask the bottom to do anything that they can't do for one reason or another under these circumstances. .

Protesting can be a fun, as for always doing as their told, see above.

If she gets to the point where she is crying becasue she does'nt want to do somehting then it's gone to far, well it has where me and my submissive is concerned anyway. She is submissive not a doormat.

If it's something they have to think twice about doing, then yes it does

We all protest on occasions.

There is nothing wrong with it and it can add a bit of fun to any scene.

Edited 1 Apr 09, 9:58 AM by All_the_best_Chris

The toppy side:

As a top i dont' give many commands, but i do expect them to be done when i do. I've discussed a lot with my sub and i wouldn't ask anything of him that he's not capable of doing! He might be uncomfortable though , for me personally i wouldn't like him protesting, it wouldn't add to the scene for me, it would annoy me, and he really wouldn't want to do that. I'm not really into humiliation anyway, so that doesn't apply.

The subbie side:

I have protested as a sub, not during a scene/play though really, usually before or after. Yes my limits have been pushed gently and that's ok after, but at the time i do panic a little.

In a previous d/s play relationship then yes i have been punished for refusing to do something, and yes it did have an effect on me, umm i got a bit resentfull (i'm a bit fiesty at times)at the time, but the next time i did comply a bit quicker.

Pegs always make me protest/beg, i hate them! Humiliation is a big thing for me, in nilla life i had too much of it, so i don't react well to it in d/s..

Sometimes i do dislike the feisty side of me, but i'm trying hard to overcome that in my subbie side...i've done things for him that i didnt' really want to do, and hey what do you know, it turns out it's not as bad as i imagined (thinking ball gag here, i was so afraid of it), i still detest the drooling, but it pleases him for me to wear it so i do it without complaint now. If he wanted the type of submissive that didn't protest occassionaly, or debate a point or two, then i don't think he would of chosen me, and if he tried to change my personality, i dont' think i would of chosen him either....

I'll do my best and i'm happy when he's happy and proud of me.

An eye for eye only ends up making the whole world blind. - Mahatma Gandhi "Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life." - Terry Pratchett.

Depends really. Sometimes bratty can be fun, sometimes there's no problem with her voicing concerns or asking questions or what not... but sometimes you just want her to do as she's told straight away. Even within 'doing as she's told', sometimes a bit of hesitation or reluctance is nice, and sometimes you just want her to throw herself into it without a second thought.

No. Sometimes.

Depends, as above.

Definitely. It's not something I always want, but a bit of screaming, kicking, crying, sobbing... a tantrum, or even a chase can be great fun.

It can do. Sometimes it's very delightful because you feel like you've broken her, bent her to your will. Other times it can ruin the pace or mood of a 'scene', and sometimes it doesn't feel like she's being reasonable or just playfully bratty, it feels like she's just being stubborn or uncooperative.

Depends whether I'm in the mood for some protesting

Sometimes. Interesting question to ask, because reluctance within a humiliation 'scene' (don't like the word myself ) is quite different to other contexts, it adds to the shame of the humiliation itself that she eventually gives in to submission and accepts the humiliation. Of course, the reverse is nice too: if she immediately and unquestioningly takes the humiliation then it's humiliating that she gave in and allowed herself to be demeaned so readily.

Anything involving the sub doing something as opposed to having something done to her. Anything in public or semi-public.

No importa que se lleva, porque todo se quitara. Ella sería la mía, para ser poseido en propiedad.

I never protest when I am playing.

Yes my limits have been pushed mainly pain related as I am soft.

No to punishment for refusing to do something as I have never played with people who are as serious I am into such endeavours.

I am sure there is but I do not know what it is.

More willing in humiliation scenes.

M

Space travels in my blood. And there ain't nothing I can do about it.
Now I know I'm being used but that's okay cause I like the abuse.
I can resist everything except temptation.
It's always funny until someone gets hurt and then it's just hilarious.
Cake or Death?

"Have people always been this angry? I've got this really funny idea that before the internet people would just write FUCK YOU! and attach it to pigeons" - Russell Howard

"Be quiet and come with me. I won't betray you."

Do I enjoy doing it - yes, and most of my playmates enjoy it when I do

Have I been punished for it - oh yes, nothing like driving a dom on to greater heights of evil....

Is not protesting being a doormat - not at all. People have different ways of submitting. All of them are equally valid, because there are lots of different types of doms. But the people I play with tend to like a sparky sub. They can be so much meaner to her!

Rapunzel - all round bad girl.... Fawcett Hall Lowewood Academy

You'd be surprised how mean people can be to subs who don't argue, fight back or protest .

The only time that sort of stuff comes up with me is in humiliation play, where it might take being told to do something a few times before I do it. I won't refuse or say no or what have you, I'm not fighting it, I'll just kind of pause. Because I find it humiliating. If I could do it straight off, it wouldn't be having the required effect!

Meh. Doormat maidie.

How does a lion go?

And don't you forget it! Now fetch me some wine. You're not as clever as you think you are you know

(you can hit me tomorrow if you like, but not on my butt, it's sore!)

Rapunzel - all round bad girl.... Fawcett Hall Lowewood Academy