This post is on the Tonbridge (TN) topics page and the D/s & M/s web board.
| Sun 30 Nov 08, 10:21 PM M3K_slave_boy 4 yrs  |
Why all the Lies from people.
I'm sorry about this Topic, but i just need to understand why people lie so much, i really don't understand it? I've been feeling like i'm not going to find a Mistress at the moment and it's really started to get to me at the moment Again i'm sorry about the low topice but any help if possible? X Slave-Boy X | |
| 30 Nov 08, 10:28 PM deviantmind UK(CB), 6 yrs  |
No idea. It seems to be the world we live in at the minute. It's full of them. Have a hug. Hope you feel better about it soon. Life moves pretty fast, if you don't sit back once in a while you may miss it. | |
| 30 Nov 08, 10:33 PM CarolinaMoon IE, 5 yrs |
There is a lot of it about sadly. Best thing to do is take everything a potential partner says with a pinch of salt until you know for a fact that its true (cynical I know but thats what I try to do these days). | |
| 30 Nov 08, 10:34 PM Slutty_Smurf UK(BL), 3 yrs |
I think like was said its sadly the world we live in, and society in general. Ive just got my head round that, and its such a sad thing. Hope you feel better about things soon and lots of *hugs* Michelle x I wander'd lonely as a cloud That floats on high o'er vales and hills, When all at once I saw a crowd, A host, of golden daffodils; Beside the lake, beneath the trees, Fluttering and dancing in the breeze. | |
| 30 Nov 08, 10:39 PM Altissimus UK(NW), 5 yrs |
The main reason people lie is low self-esteem. If you're looking for a dominant, one of the last things you should want them to have is low self-esteem, so looking for that early on should give you a fair indication of their later honesty and integrity. It's also a lot harder to maintain a facade of lies face-to-face. Get the interactions off-line as quickly as is acceptably possible (remembering it has to be mutual) - honest people have nothing to hide from going to a face-to-face (with commonsense-based security, public place etc) as soon as the formalities have been conducted. If you're still worried about it when you know them off-line, there's some good books around on reading people's tells when they lie - at a push, try the poker section of Waterstones. A. | |
| 30 Nov 08, 10:43 PM Incandescence UK, 3 yrs |
I'm a bit gullible and naive to be honest. I always take people at face value. I always think "why would they be lying when thy have no need to lie". I never think of people as being devious or spiteful until it's too late. But the simple fact is that there are devious, spiteful about, and I think that's really sad. Sad for the people they use, manipulate and hurt. But also sad for them. How sad must it be to go through life having to lie to people just to get attention. And I also think that online is a breading ground for it. It would appear, sometimes, that people don't equate the type on the screen with a real, live, breathing, feeling person. They think that they can treat people how they like and it doesn't matter. Well I'm beginning to wisen up to it now, and, I hope, am able to spot the bullshitters a bit more easily than I could before. The problem with that is that it's making me extremely cynical and wary and I don't like that one bit. I know it's probably better than being completely naive, but it really goes againslt my nature to be untrusting of people.
So I suppose that would be my advice to you too. Trust no one and look out for No1 first and foremost ETA Sorry I should have said trust no one until you get to know them better and in person. life is like a box of chocolates ........ too many coffee creams !!! Lima xx Edited 30 Nov 08, 10:47 PM by Incandescence | |
| 30 Nov 08, 10:46 PM CarolinaMoon IE, 5 yrs |
As the last two posters have said....try to meet someone as soon as possible. If they keep avoiding meeting then alarm bells should be ringing for you. | |
| 30 Nov 08, 10:46 PM yoda_dog UK(HP), 6 yrs |
People lie, it's human nature. Whether it's for personal gain, to save someone's feelings, or just for them to go down the least path of resistance, everyone lies (by omission, white lies or blatant porkies). Try not to let it get to you and try not to look to much into it. Just accept it and move on.
Take care "Aw, that's sweet...you think your opinion matters...." | |
| 30 Nov 08, 11:10 PM SirRebel UK(LN), 8 yrs |
Too many people believe this D/s lifestyle is a fantasy world, this world to them is an escape that they control and as such they make it what they want be. They do this by being not who they are but who they would like to be, this often means exaggeration of falsehood to achieve the goal, I can assure you genuine people are out there and you will find what you look for. A Special Friend To Guide You On Your Journey Can Be Just What You Need To Help You Spread Your Wings... | |
| 30 Nov 08, 11:35 PM Scribbles UK(RH), 4 yrs |
Right, so we've got cake, scones, cards on a table, ticked boxes, charades, and wiggle room for people. Someone turn the music up More seriously: are you sure they were lies? Yes, some people do mislead others, but make sure you're not making assumptions. Don't allow yourself to just hope that something is the way you'd like it to be. Good luck. Edited 30 Nov 08, 11:41 PM by Scribbles | |
| 30 Nov 08, 11:39 PM Sorceror UK(HU), 9 yrs |
These postings are always more entertaining when names are named and the full dark truth reported. Yes this results in flurries of accusations and counter accusations and the post eventually being banned but I said entertaining not illuminating... S....x. |
and when i find someone that seems really nice i find out most of what they said were lies.
