This post is on the D/s & M/s web board.
| 21 Nov 08, 12:44 PM RopeTopUK UK(N), 3 yrs  |
I think that is essentially the same thing as happens in vanilla relationships, where a person is very comfortable, or accustomed to, or conditioned to, just BEING in a relationship, rather than being with someone in particular. In both cases it can feel like an inescapable compulsion (or addiction) but usually, when the crunch comes, the person discovers that they do have the resources to survive without their safety net. I think the issue here is whether it is ethical for someone to intentionally foster this kind of dependence in a D/s relationship. I know that in a vanilla context, any kind of 'brainwashing' would be condemned by most people.
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| 21 Nov 08, 12:57 PM Backdooruk UK(BA), 12 yrs |
I agree a tendancy towards "emotional" dependance is a feature of any intensely intimate relationship. But I can't see any reason why someone shouldn't be able to consent to that dependance if both parties want it. - Chris
Anyone with a brain is manipulable. Only the truly unimaginative are difficult to control. | ||
| 21 Nov 08, 1:00 PM totallycoverme UK(M), 4 yrs |
i agree with the OPs take on IE if i was owned by another person, I would be far more dedicated and fascinated by the mental bonds rather than the physical ones IE sounds very all or nothing in terms of how much a slave would give up....i doibt i'm ready for that now as others would probably agree having said that, i would like to hop one day i can enter into such a contract I would like to know if people find IE feasable if the slave has a demanding nilla life, whereby with some aspects, its impractical for the Dom/me to have complete control? | ||
| 21 Nov 08, 2:42 PM daitchen UK(SE), 9 yrs |
I think that Internal Enslavement, like any other mind-set, is always going to be to some extent open to external influences, since ultimately the distinction between "internal" and "external" itself does not really hold true. It can be very hard, though, for us to come to terms with this emotionally, even if we can see it intellectually. | ||
| 25 Nov 08, 8:23 AM ClassAct2005 UK(N), 7 yrs  |
There is some dependence in many relationships and there's nothing wrong with that. He depends on her cooking skills as he's never boiled an egg in his life. She hasn't earned a penny for 20 years and depends on him to pay the bills or whatever or vice versa in less sexist set ups. Also emotional dependence exists in many relationships whether D/s or not. However I don't think tha'ts bad. It's when people can't internally allow themselves to depend, love and be hurt if it comes to that, where they put up barriers to prevent that happening that there are more risks. I like it when I feel a dominant man is skilled enough to make me feel I would do almost anything for him. It's a good feeling as a submissive, not a bad thing and makes me happier although I accept it comes with risks if things go wrong or you're mistreated.
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