The Ladybird guide to the CJIA (12)

This post is on the BDSM Activism web board.

Fri 19 Sep 08, 7:27 PM
spirifer
UK, 3 yrs
With thanks to M_C for the inspiration!

Janet and John like playing together. Today they are playing cowboys and indians. John has caught the naughty indian Janet and tied her to the bed.
He takes a lovely photograph of her with his new camera.
What's that noise? It's the police kicking John's door in. He has taken a bad picture of Janet. If the police do not arrest him, he will be out strangling women with their stockings and doing naughty things to children.
Link.
The state has no business in the bedrooms of the nation - Pierre Trudeau
“But then the Roman Empire fell like this- "oh shit". And we went into what the historians called the Stupid Fucker period. Where everyone was going, "Err, I dunno. Is that a Roman road? Can we eat it?"

19 Sep 08, 7:36 PM
Suadela
UK(M), 13 mths
Class, i just read that and hurt mysides laughing
Some people say i am evil, i have no idea why they think that.

19 Sep 08, 7:45 PM
Jahc99
UK, 2 yrs

Brilliant!
Now go and tell an egg how to suck granny.

19 Sep 08, 7:49 PM
Romola
UK, 3 yrs

Banksy rocks. If Ben Westwood wants to produce subversive art, he would be better off getting his inspiration there than from the Ann Summers catalogues he seems to have used up to now.
If we fit everything we write on an adult BDSM website to be understood by people who can't distinguish paedophiles from paediatricians, we might as well just run right into the closet.

19 Sep 08, 7:55 PM
Dark_Energy
UK, 7 mths

Janet says: "see this butt-plug"
John says: "hey love, that was fifty years ago why are you still talking like that.."
Janet says: "SEE THIS BUTT PLUG"
John says: .... oh fuck noooooo...

19 Sep 08, 8:12 PM
Proccie
UK(HP), 2 yrs

Dark_Energy wrote:
Janet says: "see this butt-plug"
John says: "hey love, that was fifty years ago why are you still talking like that.."
Janet says: "SEE THIS BUTT PLUG"
John says: .... oh fuck noooooo...
Well someone has to have their anus threatened.
Zen S&M: The sound of one hand smacking.

19 Sep 08, 9:32 PM
pigsub
UK, 3 yrs
spurting_cunt wrote:

Master_Craftsman wrote:
According to Ladybird Prints, it should be Peter and Jane.
Ever the pedant!
No he is a TOG!

19 Sep 08, 10:13 PM
Degenerate
UK(M), 22 mths
Oh I have laughed so hard I nearly choked and now my lungs and tummy hurt! I grew up on these kind of ladybird books, so I expect it makes the style especially hilarious for me.
I do like the police as people and respect their difficult job..... but that is seriously one of the funniest things I have ever read as a piece of satire!

CAAN - Beware the kinky porn ban! http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/p/C_A_A_N/ - CJIB Wiki and Seenoevil forum: - http://www.seenoevil.org.uk - The times they are a-changin' http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lZ_XwLSN45I - FREEDOM NOW!

19 Sep 08, 10:43 PM
DarkLordDredd
UK(NG), 6 yrs
Y!

Master_Craftsman wrote:
We'd need to expand the story, of course, to run over several pages. Janet should be tied to a post (possibly a fence-post) or to a tree and should have a rope round her neck.
Above all, we'd need an artist to create Ladybird style illustrations - preferably 1950s or 1960s style - to go with the text.
The first page should be of Janet and John playing together, perhaps with a toy tepee in the background.
Next, they are putting on "red indian" headdresses as a finishing touch to the costumes they are already wearing.
Next John has tied Janet to the post or tree and is running around her, waving a tomahawk and with his left hand to his mouth to make "red indian" noises.
Then he takes a picture of Janet with his nice new camera.
Next he takes the film to be developed at the local chemist.
He gets the film back and shows Janet the pictures he took. There is the picture of her "cooking" and some others but he cannot find all the pictures of her tied up.
Then the police kick the door in...
The final page should state that the government are treating adults as if they were children.
Been too busy to post much, but I have spoken to a good friend who is a commercial artist and suggested he might be "interested" in producing soem artwork on this. As he also provides cartoons for Private Eye I had some thoughts about seeing if he might be able to put a word in the right ear, could be fun....

20 Sep 08, 12:27 AM
joanie
UK, 3 yrs

PMSL ooohhh that is brilliant!!!!
"Do you know what nemesis means? A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent. Personified in this case by a horrible cunt... me."

20 Sep 08, 11:02 AM
Degenerate
UK(M), 22 mths

joanie wrote:
PMSL ooohhh that is brilliant!!!!
It's so funny I am scared to read it again because it HURTS!
CAAN - Beware the kinky porn ban! http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/p/C_A_A_N/ - CJIB Wiki and Seenoevil forum: - http://www.seenoevil.org.uk - The times they are a-changin' http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lZ_XwLSN45I - FREEDOM NOW!

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