(deleted) (16)

Just asking, you said something about bisexuality, that it is required, did you mean as in all poly relationships or just yours?

My excuse? I am a swede.

Sorry I didn't make that too clear - I specifically meant my relationship as my strongly founded base monoamorous relationship with TheKey means we need a bisexual party!

As I mentioned, anyone can work things differently and that's the beauty of it, so no I don't feel it's a necessity in all poly relationships.

Tuam matrem feci,
Patrick
IndelibleMarker

It's similar to the things you've said before but being able to read it on a screen at my own pace rather than listening to someone say it makes it easier to digest.

T'was a really interesting thing to read and I hope more people see it; especially those who want to know/understand more even if this weblog is 'exlusively' your thoughts/opinion and the thoughts/opinions on polymory by both polyamorous and non-polyamorous people will range.

Your power, our pleasure, my pain.

'Sweetness, sweetness I was only joking when I said I'd like to smash every tooth in your head...' The Smiths 'Big Mouth Strikes Again'

Edited 10 Sep 08, 2:13 AM by Chilli_Hendrix

Got stuck on your set up of the 'is incest wrong' argument.

It's too simplistic to say the 'yes' is solely down to the risks of inbreeding.

The other 'yes' for it is that it's generally an abuse of power perpetrated on someone who cannot give *informed* consent.

So two brothers? Could be wrong if it is an abuse of a familial relationship where one doesn't have the capacity to say no ....

Not the point of your post - but it just prevented me from getting further *trots back to read the rest*

People, and I include myself, are too nervous about their own vulnerability to take the risk of creating a more socially coherent environment.

I would love to be involved in a community that pooled resources for everyone's benefit. The big question is how to achieve this in a more practical way than polygamous.

It COULD be wrong and also conflict the basis of informed consent, yes, but how about twin brothers? (thanks to TheFalconer for pointing this one out to me )

Just because it usually is, doesn't mean that it will be in every circumstance.

Tuam matrem feci,
Patrick
IndelibleMarker

Polygamy - which you've mentioned, is actually illegal in the UK - so yes it's certainly impractical. But polyamory on the other hand isn't - it's just unusual.

My point of this thread was to show that although it's seen as very unusual, all it really requires to work are the same basic foundations that any monoamorous relationship structure requires - trust, respect and communication.

As I mentioned at the end of the blog, if you've got to the point where you feel you can take on the huge emotional responsibility of two or more other people then you've completed step one and all that's left is the tricky bit - finding two other similar people and then living with them!

I don't personally see why the pooling of funds within a polyamorous relationship between 3 or more people should be any more impractical than pooling resources between 2 people within a monoamorous one...

I never even mentioned how I believe society should function as a whole and I'm certainly not trying to argue for a communist state, or that polyamoury is right for everyone. In fact I commented that I'm very aware that it isn't. I'm simply explaining to those who are interested how and why it works for me as it's a common question I'm asked.

Tuam matrem feci,
Patrick
IndelibleMarker

Edited 10 Sep 08, 11:50 PM by IndelibleMarker

I'm not disagreeing with you in the slightest, we need to review and revise our approach to morals and attitudes as a society.

Not playing the age card again but you're not the first one to think about this. We tried a number of community living arrangements at your age too. Of course, as attitudes have changed, you have a much better chance of making it succeed than we did. Good luck.

I know I'm not the first or the last to think about it. The generations that follow me are also far more likely to succeed than I am because (hopefully) liberal attitudes towards these freedoms will develop.

I'm really not trying to encourage or even speculate on the idea of a "community" based around polyamory though. I just want to explain to those who often ask how difficult yet rewarding polyamory is in comparison to monoamory, for me, in the modern world which still maintains the traditional values imposed on us by the churches of old.

I'm assuming, by what you've said, that you tried polyamory at 'my age' and found that peoples attitudes were not yet ready for it? But if you tried it you must have liked or at least agreed with the concept of it? As you say; people are now far more open minded, so why don't you have another go? I don't see why age is a barrier to this one...

Tuam matrem feci,
Patrick
IndelibleMarker