Posted by OxMike on Sat 9 Aug 08, 9:41 AM to OxMike's blog.
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in plan that would be known as "EuroEnglish": --
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".. Sertainly, this will make the sivil sevants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favor of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with the "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "e"'s in the language is disgraceful, and they should go away.
By the 4th yar, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaning "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.
After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech ozer.
ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!!
~~~~~
Found erlier 
oX.
Edited Sat 9 Aug 08, 9:43 AM by OxMike
| 9 Aug 08, 10:32 AM just_the_two_of_us 5 yrs |
I have heard this rumour also, what I will find a problem is trying as you did to write it! I sa a gost in the rom last nite nah, don't work does it? [I saw a ghost in the room last night]
I dare anyone to give it a go, impossible. And if anyone can do it, I dare anyone else to understand what was written! |
| 17 May 09, 9:04 AM Ariane 8 yrs |
Who else was reading with a German accent by the end? |
