Role models

boy050505's profile

Posted by boy050505 on Tue 22 Jul 08, 1:52 PM

after making a prat of myself on this thread

http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/boards/generalb...

I decide to put my thoughts here instead:-

I have not attempted to try and think of these issues in relation to F/m, homosexual or polyamorous relationships. I have no significant knowledge of these types of relationships. If you do and you wish to comment from your perspective please do so.

I agree with Tanos when he says

"If we say "there is a lack of competent, authentic dominance" then it might be clearer: not enough guys who can run the psychological part of a D/s relationship competently (I do not just mean knowing how to use a flogger and be a good listener) and not enough guys who are the same on the outside as they are on in the inside (ie being authentic)."

Tanos had earlier written of the, possibly stereotypical, tendency for Doms to be more specific or factual in their public communication.

Is this an outward expression of the personality traits that result in them being successful as defined above?

Does the possible tendency of successful Doms being reticent to socially interact, fully explain their apparent scarcity? Personal observation at scene gatherings would seem to support the view that they really are in short supply. I would have expected a numerical balance to have been reached, a sort of supply and demand mechanism?

These thoughts led me to speculate that:-

If you are a female submissive seeking, waiting for that special one to say something that reveals Him to you is not going to work.

If successful Doms do not fulsomely communicate socially on open fora where is the role modelling for aspiring male dominants?

The owner of this website is the exception that proves the rule about Doms not communicating well but....

Would it be a good idea if ways were found to encourage male dominants to be more public about what they do and why? If so, how to do it?

Society in the UK seems to have difficulty with the concept of a female willingly being dominated by a man. The converse is a socially accepted stereotype. Do male doms (learn to) keep quiet about their nature because of this or does their more reticent demeanour produce this? Personally I think the former. I suspect it is a combination of an inconsistent cultural response to maleness combining with heavy handed attempts to socially engineer sexual equality in our recent past.

Would more obvious male Dominants encourage others to become what is within them but they are wary of showing?

So many questions and so few answers today.


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