Why I'm not a transexual (3)

Hollytg's profile

Posted by Hollytg on Wed 2 Jul 08, 10:38 PM

I was a transexual but I'm not now. This is how it happened...

I started to crossdress in public, I went to a shopping centre fully dressed. I was followed around the centre by two giggling school girls who thought the whole thing was just so amusing. I felt humiliated by the whole experience.

I asked myself how these two girls managed to humiliate me. The answer is I was trying to be female, I was lying and I was caught in the lie.

I did alot of thinking about that. I came to a conclusion that I wasn't a man pretending to be a woman, I was transexual. In that moment I discovered where my pride was, "transgendered Pride" if you will. I wasn't lying now this is what I was and that is what I do and I wasn't going to be caught out in the lie.

Time passed and I started thinking about what a transexual was . I came to the conclusion there wasn't a third gender, called "Transexual". "Transexual, transgendered, gender disphoria" are medical terms. Medical treatment for transexualism is sex change. It's a medical correction making, as near as possible, symmetry between mind and body to create a female body for an already female mind.

I then asked myself what is a female, well, there's two things...

1/ A female is what a female does. I was living my life as female, getting enjoyment from classically female activities and reacting like a female. By that critiera I was already female.

2/ The second occurred to me today...

The only definative way of defining a female is niether by physical or mental characteristics. It is, infact, a statement made by someone mentally and emotionally sound with no hidden agendas and that statement is...

..."I am Female"

Holly

Replies

2 Jul 08, 11:22 PM
totallycoverme
UK(M), 14 mths inspiring read
i fully agree
you're just as women as anyone who was born as a woman because you live as a woman
all trans people who wish to be recognised as female are all woman as far as i'm concerned
Laura xx

3 Jul 08, 10:10 AM
penwiggle
UK(IP), 2 yrs

Hybernation wrote:
I was a transexual but I'm not now. This is how it happened...
Time passed and I started thinking about what a transsexual was . I came to the conclusion there wasn't a third gender, called "Transsexual". "Transsexual, transgendered, gender disphoria" are medical terms. Medical treatment for transsexualism is sex change. It's a medical correction making, as near as possible, symmetry between mind and body to create a female body for an already female mind.
I then asked myself what is a female, well, there's two things...
1/ A female is what a female does. I was living my life as female, getting enjoyment from classically female activities and reacting like a female. By that criteria I was already female.
2/ The second occurred to me today...
The only definitive way of defining a female is neither by physical or mental characteristics. It is, in fact, a statement made by someone mentally and emotionally sound with no hidden agendas and that statement is...
..."I am Female"
Holly
Hi Holly,
My first reaction when I started reading the blog was something along the lines of disagreement. But then I got to the end, re-read it, then re-read it again. You've given me some things to really ponder on.
I easily meet your first criteria for being female. But I'm still trying to get my head around your 2nd definition of what a female is.
I don't know that there ISN'T a third gender called transsexual. I also don't know that, at this moment in time, I am totally comfortable calling myself 100% female.

Perhaps this is a better way of saying it.. wrote:

The only definitive way of defining a PERSON'S GENDER is neither by physical or mental characteristics. It is, in fact, a statement made by someone mentally and emotionally sound with no hidden agendas and that statement is...
..."I am (INSERT GENDER)"
In my case, at this moment in time, "I am Transsexual"
If you are born genetically female, then you are considered by yourself, and everyone around you to be female (I'm excluding FtoM TS). It's a given, a no-brainer and never questioned.
But I wasn't born genetically female. I came into being female through a process of hormones and surgery. And even though I felt female in my mind, I am still learning what it means to be female, and to truly feel female throughout my entire being. So for me, my sex and gender are still in transition - hence I still consider myself to be trans-sexual.
Friends have told me that after a couple of years, this transient feeling fades away, and I'll start to feel totally female.
Thank you for a very stimulating blog.
Pen
I'm not a switch, just a Libra

3 Jul 08, 1:50 PM
Hollytg
UK, 4 yrs
Hmmmmm, it comes down to two things, either you are female and what you have gone through is corrective or you WANT to be female.
I really can't imagine you (and I) going through the things we have because we "want" to be. Remember the post about transgendered children?, this is more than a desire, more than want, it's a need to be the mental sex we were supposed to be. The numbers of suicides among the trangendered community show that.
When do you get to say your female?. When you change your passport?, when you have a sex change?, when you change your name?. when the world says your female?. There'll come a time when you realise that all that we've gone though is corrective and that you were female all along and the only thing that stops you being female is that you haven't said it yet.
Love Holly
There are no absolutes


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