This post is on the Other BDSM web board.
| Thu 26 Jun 08, 8:06 PM Lovelace UK(LS), 4 yrs   |
What efforts do you make to be what your other half wants ? If you see them eyeing up slim women does it inspire you to lose weight ? If you see them drooling over a six pack does it inspire you to work out ? I'm not talking about insecurities here or trying to be something you're not. Just how far would you go to please your partner ? If you couldn't do it would you inlist their help ? Would you inlist someone elses help ? Or is it a case of I am what I am, like it or lump it ? Choozy. x
One day my ship will come in, and knowing my luck, I'll be at the airport !! Edited Thu 26 Jun 08, 8:10 PM by Lovelace | |
| 26 Jun 08, 8:08 PM MasterVilosSlave UK(CB), 6 yrs |
I would be more than happy to change. My husband loves big boobs at some point I want a breast enlargement.  He wants me to have tattoos, etc. Although he doesn't seem to care about weight - I think the bigger belly is offset against the boobs.edited: What about you? That which does not kill us, makes us stranger... Edited 26 Jun 08, 8:09 PM by MasterVilosSlave | |
| 26 Jun 08, 8:10 PM Deviant_By_Design 4 yrs |
In terms of physicality I try and look after my body because it makes me feel good. I guess I would try and dress in a way that turns someone else on but ultimately it would still be done in my own style. I find it fun and exciting to please someone else and to know they find me desireable. Just not at the detriment of my own feelings. I like to be accepted for who I am. 'I don't necessarily agree with everything I think and I don't stand by anything I've said in the past' | |
| 26 Jun 08, 8:12 PM ClassAct2005 UK(N), 7 yrs |
To want to be controlled in how I look, what I do and lots of other areas is at the core of my sexuality. So yes the dynamic for me is he leads, guides, requires and I follow. If a dominant man has no interest in doing that, if it doesn't make him hard to think about it, then he's probably not for me. | |
| 26 Jun 08, 8:14 PM metalmiss UK(CR), 9 yrs |
If i wasn't what He wanted, if He didn't find me pleasing, i wouldn't be here. my Master is Poly and within that He enjoys variety.. If i tried to copy every girl i saw Him looking at i would need therapy within a week! An attempt by me to change myself for any such reason other than my health would actually be displeasing to Him. x "I would never harm you darling, but there is a world of difference between hurt and harm." - Screw The Roses, Send Me The Thorns | |
| 26 Jun 08, 8:15 PM Lovelace UK(LS), 4 yrs |
I already have implants, go for it, it was the best thing I ever did ! (my 40th birthday present from me to me) ! I do have a food problem, I need to stop eating it ! Lol. Although I'm an average size 12 I still seem to be lumpy in the wrong places and was happiest with myself at size 10. My Dom has expressed a preference for the slimmer woman and I would love to be able to achieve this size again for him but I am seriously struggling with it. He encourages me by rewarding me when I have a "good food" day but I would love to get some outside help (without his knowledge)and to be able to reveal a swelte toned figure and see the look in his eyes. This would be a severe ego boost for me ! Choozy. x One day my ship will come in, and knowing my luck, I'll be at the airport !! | |
| 26 Jun 08, 8:20 PM smallwitch UK, 4 yrs |
For me it is not quite a case of like it or lump it, it's more that I am dubious as wether changing yourself for someone else actually works. I know myself that if I am strongly attracted to someone, their particular characteristics become appealing and something I then like in others.
Edited 26 Jun 08, 8:37 PM by smallwitch | |
| 26 Jun 08, 8:21 PM Mistress_Avralivia UK(RG), 4 yrs £ |
I am on a supervised diet, but even though this is controlled by him, I do it for me as well as him... The main reasons he wants me to lose weight is because I would feel better about myself and more confident. It's heartbreaking when I dont lose weight though I feel a total sense of loss and misery because I have let myself and him down.
However I have lost about 13lbs in the last few weeks, so am very happy and feeling good Edited to add: I know he loves me as I am though, and if he does eye up younger thinner women thankfully im never aware of it! "Dance like nobody's watching; love like you've never been hurt. Sing like nobody's listening; live like it's heaven on earth." | |
| 26 Jun 08, 9:02 PM Lovelace UK(LS), 4 yrs |
I'm not just talking about doing this to please someone else, I'm talking about doing it for both of you. Would it not give you a buzz to see the delight in your partners eyes if you had done something that pleased them ? As well as getting a buzz yourself for your actual achievement ? Is it kind of using the pleasure of your partner to encourage you to make your own achievements ? Am I making any sense or do I need to put the voddy away ? Lol. Choozy. x One day my ship will come in, and knowing my luck, I'll be at the airport !! | |
| 27 Jun 08, 6:45 AM ClassAct2005 UK(N), 7 yrs |
I'm sure most people dom or sub, male or female, get huge delight in pleasing their partner whether that's who we look or things we do in general. There is that side of it and then also the kink side in that I imagine most submissives, as I do, like to please in a D/s sense too and I suppose a third aspect on the looks/clothes/weight issue that for some people in D/s relationships he wants to control and she is aroused by having that control but that's a different point.
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| 27 Jun 08, 7:00 AM janusxuk UK(HP), 7 yrs |
I have to say I have to disagree here. Apart from some weight gain or loss, I don't believe people can really significantly change outside the boundaries of their comfort zones and any attempt to do so, either internally or externally "imposed", can lead to some real conflict. I'd much sooner the person was happy with themselves rather than attempt to confirm to some ideal image they thought I had for them. Yes there are women in the world that I'll look at more than once and maybe there's a pattern to the image type that catches my eye more often. Having said that not every woman I've met, of what ever external image, is someone I'd want to spend any time with and I'm sure that's the same for everyone. It may be a cliche but for me it really is what's inside the package and whether the whole person is in balance that counts in the long term.
Mind you, it is fun taking a sub outside her body image comfort zone once in a while Just because I'm a civil engineer doesn't mean you'll find me under "Boring" in the yellow pages |
