Posted by ghost666 on Fri 11 Apr 08, 7:39 AM to ghost666's blog.
i love talking on the phone to people, i find the voices can express so much and you really can "feel" the truth and personality.
i had a long call from the ex last night about certain things, things which were hard for us both to talk about but in a couple of weeks he is back in the UK and is coming over so we can sit and talk face to face over a choice mini has made and i am exploring.
we both know it wont happen over night, or it will be something easy on me or him but its an option worth looking into.
felt very strange chatting to him and hearing him say " I am sorry "
it was the first "sorry" i have ever heard from him that felt genuine.
little one had a really long chat with him , which over past few weeks has i think settled her down a little as she has been having a bit of a crap time up and down doctors all time with an on going complaint but at least that is been sorted with a specialist referral.
10 weeks to go till im back at my place of work for real and the areas im learning are so interesting,
yesterday i had an oppurtunity to be part of something very sensitive and hush hush, and i would never be given that chance the rank i am now.....or even the next 2 up!
my mobile phone is fucked , it got dropped in tea a little while ago and it is constantly turning its self off, missing letters off in texts, and all sorts so im hoping o get it replaced soon,
last night my lil ones phone was a god send as i was able to speak to the ex on that.
ive got a very quiet weekend ahead.
tonight i got mini having an over night stay at a friends as she has got some fun planned which is really good for her...nice to see her getting out really again.
ill be looking forward to recieving some paperwork from the ex solicitor to sign some stuff over as i told him i cant pay my solicitor right now but there are a few things that need sorting, he actually was very understanding and came up with some ways around stuff right now.
had another rough night sleeping and this morning im so cold nd tired its untrue but hey ho.
mind you the thought process left behind after the call with the ex yesterday evening is enough t of whirred anyones mind.
am i doing the right thing?
is it going to work?
will there be a benifit?
what does it mean for me?
for her?
for him?
but no matter what anyone says about me or thinks about me, my daughter comes first and i will not have her look back on her life with hatred toward me for stopping her from chances.
she has had enough crap in her short life.
so with a whirrring head im off for my bath, go to work and come home and well probably wander a bit more.
| 11 Apr 08, 12:21 PM Masters_Delight UK(WD), 5 yrs   |
Hi hun. The fact that you and your ex can talk and get on is a big bonus for your little one. Im assuming that you are thinking of letting her go and stay with him. I read your post earlier in the week about her asking if she could live with her dad. Your a very brave lady for thinking of her and putting her first. I know i couldnt be that brave. Big hugs to you hunny.x Dont be ashamed of what you've been through. |
| 11 Apr 08, 3:16 PM ghost666 6 yrs |
this is where the oddness begins , we have not been able to be get on as people but have spoken about mini. it came as a complete shock the way he was with me last night and long we spoke for. i have been accused of abbandoning her by some and wanting to throw her away....this has come from my friends!!! is it any wander i have not discussed with my family.!! being a good parent is about putting their needs before your own and nurture and develop them into good adults in the hope you done something right. why should i deprive her of a reltionship she wishes to explore when she has every right to want that? im not sitting pretending its easy to thinkon or even talk about but me n mini have spent a long long time talking it over the pluses and the minuses. we know its not an easy choice for anyone in the triangle im just trying to do what is right for her and her alone ive seen your flag on the marble arch, |
| 11 Apr 08, 5:19 PM ghost666 6 yrs |
sweety i would but my phone dont work darling xxxxx but thank you .
and my numbers are in the dead one ive seen your flag on the marble arch, |
| 11 Apr 08, 6:13 PM Masters_Delight UK(WD), 5 yrs |
Joint custody is a good thing for children. It keeps them in touch with everyone that cares for them. Its all about being equal. My sons dad couldnt give a flying fuck about him. Your little one is one lucky little girl to have both parents looking out for her wellbeing. And more importantly it shows that you are the bigger person because you are putting your little ones wants and needs before your own. It cant be easy for you to have her go away to be with her dad and i applaud you for being so brave. Id curl up and die if my son wanted to live with his dad. Just make sure you have a support network standing by for you hunny. Mummys need care and love too.x Dont be ashamed of what you've been through. |
| 11 Apr 08, 11:07 PM masters_little_toy 6 yrs |
I am happy for you hun, you know where to find me, hugs Look but don't touch, touch but don't taste, taste but don't swallow...... who am I kidding!!! |
