Posted by RosieLady on Thu 14 Feb 08, 2:21 PM to RosieLady's blog.
Is it just me that has an issue with this idea of "falling in love".. I was reading another thread and didnt want to hi jack it, so putting my thoughts here. On the other thread a lot of people were saying things like "people fall in love, it happens". To me this seems an odd assumption, as though falling in love is something that happens to us and is outside our control, like a meteor falling on our head or something.
I just dont believe that to be true. In my view, we have a point in a relationship with someone where we make a choice whether to allow it to go deeper or not. Its not something which "just happens" its an act of will to allow it to happen. Anyone else have thoughts on this? It atualy annoys me a lot when its used as an excuse for other actions..yes I left my 5 children and so on but hey I fell in love!! Bollox!!!
just my take!!
Edited Thu 14 Feb 08, 2:24 PM by RosieLady
| 14 Feb 08, 2:47 PM Danver UK, 5 yrs  |
I would broadly agree, but there is a dynamic that has to be taken into account - I can't love just anyone, I couldn't commit to anyone, there has to be something about them that I crave, need even. **waiting for inspiration to strike** |
| 14 Feb 08, 2:58 PM crimsonsky UK, 7 yrs  |
I don't think you can stop yourself falling in love but it isn't an excuse for your actions, there is choice involved. |
| 14 Feb 08, 3:11 PM Fox2006 9 yrs |
Well there are different stages to 'falling in love'. attraction, infactuation and attachment. Most of what people call falling in love is the infactuation stage. Its the stage where the passion and excitment of being togther gives you that high. However its the attachment stage that really cements that bond of love. At every stage there is a moment or many moments when we choose to decide to go further or not. People sometimes confuse the attachment stage with the feeling that the love has gone, however its just that the stage has gradually changed into attachment. Each stage has its own different challenges and pitfalls, the attachment stage is the hardest I think. It's the stage that involves marriage or long-term relationship, it takes hard work to keep the bond feeling 'worthwhile'but it is so worth it. The attraction and infactuation stages can really mess with your normal thinking and can make people do some crazy things however I agree that it should never be used as an excuse. Its not easy to see clearly when yer head is full of chemicals and hormones. falling in lust - attraction stage falling in love - infactuation stage In love - attachment stage Valentines Day is a great day for all stages, but mostly for the attachment stage...for re-affirming the love bond. The love bond is like a living thing, it needs feeding and norishment...else it dies...all too easily sometimes.
Fox Edited 14 Feb 08, 4:52 PM by Fox2006 |
| 14 Feb 08, 4:25 PM RosieLady UK(AB), 6 yrs |
totally agree Fox !!!! Scandal is gossip made tedious by morality (dear oscar) |
| 14 Feb 08, 5:20 PM cuddlybeth UK, 6 yrs |
thanks Rosie and Fox totally agree with you both |
