This post is on the SM/Bondage/Fetish web board.
| Wed 23 Jan 08, 5:36 PM drkaby UK, 5 yrs  |
Hi... I felt that I had to put finger to keyboard on this subject. I am pretty pissed off with the lack of response whenever i answer an ad or request for a person to contact another. I have sent in at least 18 applications to other members in the last couple of months (all in the manner that was requested). Not one person has bothered to reply. Surely a simple "thanks, but no thanks" would be courteous,or if poss, a little more. Am I that bad (check my profile,if so,please let me know) Your comments would be appreciated. Chris | |
| 23 Jan 08, 5:42 PM Hawked UK(CF), 5 yrs  |
I believe most female subs/switches/dommes on here get bombarded with hundreds of memo's all the time so they probably don't have the time. However being polite, courteous and having something interesting to say would be the best way to go about approaching someone. | |
| 23 Jan 08, 5:49 PM Pegasus7 UK(CT), 5 yrs |
Have to agree on this one... manners cost nothing. Is it not common these days just to be rude to all and look after number one? It takes no time for anybody to reply to a simple request and it can always be done in a polite way. Treat others how you would like to be treated and then we all might be able to enjoy our lifes a little better. Edited 23 Jan 08, 5:51 PM by Pegasus7 | |
| 23 Jan 08, 5:51 PM DDDDom 6 yrs |
Online responses can take time - people do get absolutely bombarded with messages out of the blue. Turn it around and see how you would like 100 - 200 messages turn up in your inbox. It may be a novelty for a day or two but after reading the same uninspired, aspirational, fantasist rubbish over and over again it's going to pall a bit - n'est pas?  So people really haven't got bad manners they are just fatigued in general and I'm afraid unless your mail is distinctive, creative, detailed and engaging - no-one is going to give a toss - sorry I am not being rude here just stating my point of view. I like to message people with absolutely no agenda from time to time and I like to make it reassuring, funny, kinda interesting or relevant to their profile which I read in minute detail and pick up on points or I'll fire away a funny one liner just to see the response - more often than not it gets a reply. But really as everyone will no doubt say in a while - get yourself along to a munch and interact with real people - it's faster, more engaging, more fun and gives you a good night out if nothing else. Putting messages into bottles in cyberspace is only partially successful and unless you match the person perfectly and are a genius on intuitively picking up on their inner personality either through serendipity or design - I'd just focus on reading the forums for a bit and interacting from there if relevant and in context. Hope that helps... Sex pleasure in woman is a kind of magic spell; it demands complete abandon; if words or movements oppose the magic of caresses, the spell is broken. Simone de Beauvoir Edited 23 Jan 08, 5:52 PM by DDDDom | |
| 23 Jan 08, 5:52 PM rehtael_ni_dal  UK(G), 9 yrs |
http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/boards/generalb... Firstly the above thread provides comments on another time when the question was asked. It might be a good frame of reference. Secondly in comment of your profile. It is quite brief, does not really tell anybody about your personality. People like to get to know the character of potential partners. Your profile just states your likes in terms of BDSM. You might try to get involved more in the great debates on IC. That way people and any potential play partners get to know about you and your reactions and what makes you you! As you are aware male subs have to go that wee tad extra and more effort is probably required. Dominants are strange creatures - sometimes they like you to take interest in them as if they are a person - Sometimes that helps. These creatures like to know that they interest you - not for what they can do for you - but for what you can do for them. Perhaps you are trying too hard in the male sub wanting a mistress approach. Try to get at them by showing that you are a gentleman (alot of Dommes love that).
Make relationships, network at clubs and/or munches then perhaps these relationships will grow into something more fun ...but what do I know - I'm jut a mle sub myself!
There are lots of rumours about me ! - All of them true | |
| 23 Jan 08, 5:52 PM massado200 UK(LS), 8 yrs |
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| 23 Jan 08, 5:55 PM drkaby UK, 5 yrs |
Thanks for the quick response. I have mainly applied to males who advertise for a male slaves (although one or two may be female). I am always selective as to whom I apply to(making sure that I am offering what is required),so as not to waste anyones time. I always note sexual orientation,age criteria,likes and dislikes and geographical postion. Chris | |
| 23 Jan 08, 6:01 PM Katalena UK(GL), 5 yrs |
As others have said - many on here (and other sites) are sent message after message and do not always get to reply in time that people "expect" them to. I will always reply to a message that is pleasant and polite - I can't see a reason not to BUT sometimes I am busy or have so many that I do not have the time or inclination to sit and trawl through the bullshit, the copy and paste and the down right rude to reply to the ones that may be pleasant memos. I will generally go back and reply when I do have the time. Kat "Your ego is writing cheques, your body can't cash" | |
| 23 Jan 08, 6:01 PM teufel_tanz UK(HA), 7 yrs |
This topic has come up many times the boards - Personally we reply to each memo that we recieve unless they are rude / offensive but I guess this is down to the recipient's personal preference.
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| 23 Jan 08, 6:02 PM Pegasus7 UK(CT), 5 yrs |
When was the last time anybody got 200 messages in one hit?...It would take a week just to read them! | |
| 23 Jan 08, 6:05 PM naughty_chicken 4 yrs |
think of it as unsolicited mail. do you respond to every viagra email you get in your inbox?
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