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| Elohims_jay |
on Tue 4 Dec 07, 10:23 PM to Elohims_jay's blog.
Has been a shit almost 2 weeks … The usual monthly curse has been getting worse over last 3 months with this one going into overdrive resulting in a D and C today. And of course with my history I have to go in for a smear and probably a biopsy just to double check everything is still ok.
So I have been feeling a bit sorry for myself to say the least. It feels like I have been in labour for 2 fucking weeks. Apparently the doctor says you are not meant to get that level of contractions with a period … no shit !! lol Anyway hopefully it is all over with now, still feeling uncomfortable after today's procedure but at least it seems to have done the trick and things have finally stopped.
But all that aside I am not here to moan or whine or look for pity … I just want to say a big loving thank you to Himself. Since all this kicked off I have been so looked after it has had me in tears a few times. My favourite foods purchased to tempt a non existent appetite (and threats of lucozade if I dont eat lol) my two addictions of chocolate and cigarettes kept topped up so I never run out, even going out at midnight at times, a big soft fluffy reindeer brought to cuddle up to under blanket. In fact I have not been allowed to lift a finger and have been spoilt rotten.
But what has been the best in all of this is his strength. Of course it has been mentioned that there will be tests to check to see if the cancer has returned and that has always been at the back of my mind .. it still is until I get the all clear. I also know it has been on his mind but he has not shown it … instead he has held me and stroked my hair and told me it will all be fine and we will get through anything together.
It is times like this I remember just how lucky I am to have the evil sadistic bastard, because it is times like this when he can take control and keep me sane and safe despite his own fears.
So thank you Sir …. And have I told you today just how much I fucking love you ?
Yours always
J
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Edited Tue 4 Dec 07, 10:31 PM by Elohims_jay
| 4 Dec 07, 10:37 PM DevilRob 7 yrs |
Hugs and warm thoughts to you both. And if you need anything we're only a memo away. Rob and dawny 'Fast is fine but accuracy is forever'~Wyatt Earp |
| 4 Dec 07, 10:38 PM DKLeather  UK(S), 11 yrs |
~hugs you tight~
He's one of the good guys... x ~doffs cap~ |
| 4 Dec 07, 11:05 PM LeatherEagle UK(S), 7 yrs |
Well said. Love and hugs to you both. ~S~ Luisa xxx "Fear is the ultimate sensation" |
| 5 Dec 07, 3:42 AM emergencynurse3 UK, 5 yrs |
Hugs and love to you both. Just 'yell' if theres anything I can do.. Ellie xx |
| 5 Dec 07, 1:20 PM Xx_pam_xX 4 yrs |
Just wanting you both to know W/we are thinking of ya and have hugs waiting for you!!
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| 5 Dec 07, 9:23 PM scarlett101 UK, 7 yrs |
Big Higs to you hun.
Ben.. keep giving her chocolate and cigarettes You know wher ei am if you need owt. fi XXXXXXXXXXX ..I've been watching You, control me. |
| 6 Dec 07, 8:44 AM maihri UK, 8 yrs |
Chin up, chick. Let us all know how things go for you. Thinking of you x Maihri |
