Whatever happened to love? (53)

I feel a D/s relationship at its most healthy would be characterised by deep love on both sides. Loving subservience and loving guidance; loving submission and loving domination. This is the type of D/s relationship which would make legislation irrelevant. It's fine to try to prevent the worst abuses by putting boudaries around (safe, honest, open, consensual, sane etc) but far healthier if those sort of boundaries are unnecessary because the relationship is characterised by love. What I mean by this is that each particpant is deeply committed to the welfare and well-being of the other and will give time and work to acheieve that.

Is this how others see D/s at its best?

It's mentioned on my profile

R

Today's the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.
Faith is a certainty without evidence, trust is empirical.

Choozy. x

One day my ship will come in, and knowing my luck, I'll be at the airport !!

Same here for us....Our love for each other in relationship/marriage like ours is paramount.

There is so much love between us.

susieslave

To grow old is mandatory. To grow up is optional

I think maybe there are relationships here, that are based on other things, and love maybe does not come into it at all, but I would never go to any Dom, without that feeling of love, not for the Dom and how he Dom's, but love for the person within, with me, that always has to come first, which is why I had trouble finding anyone! and now I have, he aint ever gonna find a reason to leave me!

A very selfish slave

D/s is an expression of our love for each other and thus it goes beyond the physical excitement (not that there's anything wrong with that, of course!)

"One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other." (Jane Austen)

The truth is though, not everyone who does D/s with someone has to love them. It is not necessary if the people are not in a 24/7 living together situation or are happy to be more casual in their approach.

There should always be respect evident even if there is not love.

Edited 11 Oct 07, 9:54 AM by Ms_Valentine

People either take it for granted (when talking about relationships) or assume it's not relevant (when talking about technique). I don't think either approach is completely correct, though from memory there have been a few threads in the past that went beyond that.

- Chris

"...man will cease to be a slave and gain a dignity that is more than an exercise in cautious conformism, only when he becomes capable of stepping outside the most fundamental convictions, including those convictions, which allegedly make him human"
- Paul Feyerabend on epistemological anarchism

Edited 11 Oct 07, 9:55 AM by Backdooruk

I'm always rabbiting on about loving relationships and how love, sex, equanamity and mutual sharing of lifes adventures and all those precious vanilla things seem to be missing from the bdsm scene.

Infact reading all the posts to your thread I think love is very much alive but most responders to this thread seem to already be in relationships. I think it is the single folk who seem to neglect love a bit.

It is not part of many of the singletons profiles and posts. I think most of the single sub guys are being lead by pure sexual urge and most of the single Dommes want love but they seperate love from the whole sub/Dom scenario which is why there is no mention of love in much of whats written. I don't think this applies to the single female subs as much, single male Doms I'm not sure about because I don't look at their profiles much and it definately doesn't apply to me

Edited 11 Oct 07, 10:20 AM by luke35