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| x_zero_x |
on Fri 11 May 07, 9:05 AM to x_zero_x's blog.
This week marks the 5th anniversary of my Mum's death, it's true what they say, the pain of such a loss never truly goes away, for me, i think it's subsided as far as it will go. Normally this anniversary is a difficult time for me as i was close to my Mum, but this year it's been nigh on impossible. Events have conspired against me and i've found myself having nobody but my daughter for company, this is normally all fair and well, but a toddler isn't exactly able to lend emotional support. Everybody has abandoned me this week, i have had no help, nobody to take her when the tears came, and nobody offered to take her on the actual date to let me visit her grave .i've just been left as if they expect me to carry on and bear the weight of the world on my shoulders. i'm told next week will be different but i couldn't care less about next week, there's nothing important about next week.
i fear it's too late, the damage is done...
| 11 May 07, 9:11 AM Wiley_Kit UK(PE), 7 yrs |
Sorry to hear you are feeling like that. Times like that are hard. It was only two years ago my brother died, I still feel hurt by it, as you say the pain never really goes away. Its even harder when it is his anniversary of his death, as no one around me ever remembers and it makes me so angry, but after I calm down I always realise that people generally dont do things like that on purpose. Times like this we do get oversensitive. Try and be strong, Im sure your mum would rather that than you getting upset. xxx I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence or insanity to anyone, but theyve always worked for me - Hunter S Thompson | |
| 11 May 07, 9:50 AM x_zero_x UK(DD), 10 yrs |
Thank you, of course you're right. Something that helps is when a friend unexpectedly calls you (thanks ghost Sign here and make the world a batter place, even if it is only for 45 days! | |
| 11 May 07, 10:36 AM Lex_Magister UK(M), 7 yrs |
Sending You warmth. Lex As I type I reach out My hand, as you read you are then touched. | |
| 11 May 07, 12:23 PM Lucifer38 UK, 7 yrs |
You and i are nearly in the same boat x In September it will be 4 years since mine passed away. Apart from my small child, she was my only family. Ok friends and partners i have but no family. You get to a point where your thoughts and feelings by and large remain the same. Nothing will ever come close to the loss i felt and in the following year everything was hard. I guess i've "plateaued" now and as someone has mentioned before me, the last thing you're mum wants to see is you unhappy. Dare i say Zero, on the day, sit back, think of the good times and how you laughed and i bet she laughs with you x | |
| 11 May 07, 5:11 PM Satankat UK, 6 yrs |
I'd try to help, but I'm really no good at emotional stuff or being around small children. If you ever want to talk I'll listen, about that's about all I'm good for, and I tend to lack tact, so it's generally best for me to stay away. You know we are just around the corner though and if there's ever anything we can help with you just need to shout. A pup is taught that it's duty in life is to find a human being to serve and to love. A kitten is taught to find an adaptable and affectionate slave who will respond to kindness. | |
| 11 May 07, 6:46 PM Strummy UK(SW), 6 yrs |
Sending love. xxx Jade Be excellent to each other | |
| 11 May 07, 7:13 PM maid_irene UK(LN), 6 yrs |
My Mum died on 11/11/2000, I can't seem to pu it behind me either. But people keep reminding me of the date, even though they don't mean to remember such a serious loss. Hugs, irene.
"Service which is rendered without joy helps neither the servant or the served. But all other pleasures and possesions pale into nothingness before service that is rendered in a spirit of joy." |
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