Puppy play gone wrong... (78)

This is worrying and makes puppy play seem like a really negative thing. Clearly this particular man was coerced into the situation, but for a lot of us, this (apart from the washing powder - wtf???) wouldn't be that big a thing. It's humiliation, the cigarette burning is a pain thing and the shaving, well, that is a little bit silly, but I'm sure some people on here do it to their subs.

This only makes BDSM look worse in the eyes of the 'vanilla' crowd, and I don't really know what to think about it. Is it terrible that I thought most of what that article was talking about sounded like a brilliant (if unrealistic) fantasy?

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education. Mark Twain.

Reminds me of situations when a man meets a woman and has consensual sex and then next thing he's arrested for rape, just cos the woman gets pissed off that he didn't send flowers next morning.

With the things we do in consensual BDSM scenes, it's very easy to make accusations of abuse, after any consensual scene. Tying someone up? That's kidnap & false imprisonment. Flogging them? That's assault & battery or GBH. Knifeplay? Assault with a deadly weapon.

This is a scary reminder of how any consensual casual scene could end up and the trust needed of all parties.

--------------------------------------------------- -
"Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification, but through fidelity to a worthy purpose" Helen Keller (1880-1968)

Edited 3 Apr 07, 5:22 PM by MKane

Yeah, I've heard of that, happens all the time.

*eyerolls*

moo

Someone's barking here and I don't think it's any puppy.

You wouldn't also advocate the 'short skirt she was asking for it' rape defense would you?

deelish

I think it was teeny bit ironic - I hope

Doesn't sound like it going by the rest of the post. Sounds rather more like garden variety reactionary victim-blaming bollocks. Much as I'd rather it were ironic.

moo

Or possibly to highlight how easy it is to make accusations... a case of "2 sides to the story, so let's not hang them before all the evidence is in".. and... "There but for the grace of God, go many of us".

A lot is made of the need for safecalls to protect the submissives and to only play with experienced Doms, but this shows how Doms can also be vulnerable when arranging a scene.

--------------------------------------------------- -
"Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification, but through fidelity to a worthy purpose" Helen Keller (1880-1968)

Edited 3 Apr 07, 5:33 PM by MKane

For something to have gone wrong enough for someone to try to escape (rather than just safewording out, having a cup of tea and going home) is pretty bad and a duty of care seems to have been failed somewhere. Consent isn't just about agreeing to something regardless of context. I figured the SM community had developed it beyond that to something more nuanced.

moo

Yeah, cos nobody ever makes false accusations, do they? lol

Sounds like you've already found them guilty of all charges, and are preparing the tar & feathers, based on one person's accusations. No need for any more evidence or a trial.

--------------------------------------------------- -
"Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification, but through fidelity to a worthy purpose" Helen Keller (1880-1968)

Edited 3 Apr 07, 5:37 PM by MKane

To you, for whom it sounds like the world's full of women crying rape because men they sleep with don't buy them flowers.

moo

Edited 3 Apr 07, 5:37 PM by foibey