After a long hibernation, I'm back!

Well, sort of. A bit. We'll see.

--Me--

Not sure I'd self-identify as poly. Go down that road and it's only a matter of time before you start to describe yourself as 'bouncy'. I'm currently pretty happy with the term 'tarting about'.

A good description of me would probably be a pisstaking wee bastard. I rarely take anything seriously. Probably not you, and certainly not myself.

My misanthropy is only half-serious. Think Bernard Black, but without the Irish accent, or the terrible hygiene. Or Bill Bailey to boss around. And I don't own a bookshop. Or - ok, basically, I'm nothing like Bernard Black, but dearly wish I were.

Sometimes a bit shy at first, but stick with me. I'll be cussing your mum in no time at all while drinking you under the table.

Short and terribly, terribly bitter about it. A bit flabby, but I make up for it by also having terrible muscle tone and prematurely greying temples. It's only a matter of time before I resemble a badger. A short, bitter, flabby badger.

Switchy, hopefully reasonably imaginative, and sometimes excessively eager to please. I'll balance it out by neglecting you at other times.

Role policing bores. The. Fuck. Out of me. None of that True Dom, True Sub nonsense, ta.

I overuse parentheses.

---You---

Possibly poly, non-monogamous, massive tart, whatever. Open to switchery, mischief, shoplifting and arson.

Alternative types always preferred (is that a given on here?).

Tattoos and piercings definitely work for me. Though my body modification is regrettably limited to a tongue-piercing (so far).

I'm a relentless rationalist atheist skeptic Dawkins-worshipper who loves to stamp on your dreams. Still enjoy an argument, though.

Own teeth and hair (if they're in a jar, that still counts).

Please form an orderly queue.

Eye colour: Dark   Hair colour: Braahn   Height: 5ft 6in   Weight: 12st 6lb   BMI: 27.9  

This profile was last updated on 27 Mar 12, 11:14 PM.

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