I'm definitely submissive (and a masochist) but in the rest of my life I'm happy and proud to be in control and I want to stay that way. Last year I left a long-term relationship in which I felt stifled and felt that I had almost lost the woman I want to be - I'm in the process of finding her again, and it's fun!

I'm not looking for anything serious at this point, just for friendship and fun. I'm bisexual - by which I mean I'm genuinely interested in men and women, not that I get off with women to interest/titillate men. I do find it difficult to have free time at evenings and weekends as I work shifts and I have a child.

I'm looking for real-life friends, not ongoing online chat. I don't generally reply to IC chat from people I don't know, so if you want to talk to me please memo me.

In the rest of my life, I have a very responsible job which I love - I'm fortunate enough to have a job which I genuinely enjoy and I know how lucky I am. I work in a traditionally male industry and have had to hold my own with the guys as well as prove my ability to get where I am.

I have lots of friends and a wide range of interests - music is a biggy - a lot of what I like would be classed as world/folk/(alt) country/reggae/classical... I love lots of good music.

- I love to read, I enjoy thoughtful sci-fi and fantasy (Philip K Dick, Kim Stanley Robinson, Marge Piercy, Octavia Butler, Iain M Banks to name but a few).

- I love knitting and crochet and my house is being taken over by yarn and half-finished projects (I'm not very tidy), I also love to cook when I have time.

- I'm very political (left-wing) and active in my trade union (as much as I can be with time constraints). I've removed the bit about reading the Guardian as I've got a bit annoyed with it so I'm trying the Independent for a while instead.

I'm as happy having a jar with the guys after work as I am at the opera - I like to think I make the most of what's on offer and am generally a positive person who enjoys life.