Showing off all the good bits (well, the ones they'll let me show)

IC Name: erath Joined: 27 Mar 2004 Last visit: 6 days ago Sex/gender: Male Location: Edinburgh, UK Age: 29

The name “erath” – yes, it is exactly the typo that it appears to be – is intentionally meaningless, chosen as not to say anything about my personality or character. Hopefully, you should now read onwards to learn some more about me! The first and most important thing to point out is that I have been permanently collared by my beautiful and wonderful Mistress, Ajay. We are also engaged to be married in 2011, and I value both rings – the one around my finger and the one around my neck – fully and equally.

I am a submissive male in my mid-twenties who was introduced to the local club and munch scene in the autumn of 2003. Despite an almost unbearable nervousness and shyness that threatened to hold me back in the beginning, I eventually relented to the power and wonder of all of this. “All of this” is a blanket term I'm going to use because my definition of things like D/s, BDSM, power exchange, and all the other nomenclature I may use will probably not match the meanings that you choose to assign to those terms. (Unless I'm reading this back to myself, in which case I'm having the mother of all circular arguments.) But that's all right! We do things our own way and I maintain a fierce individuality in all walks of life, refusing to submit carelessly to trend, fad, or the silent majority.

Much of my entrée to BDSM life consisted of short scenes with friends and strangers-soon-to-be-friends in the various fetish clubs in Glasgow and Edinburgh – latterly more of Scotland and northern England as well – combined with a veritable mountain of self-investigation and shepherding from a clutch of like-minded locals that I fell in with from the beginning. Although we do not all stay in touch anymore I remain indebted to this group without whom I would have failed to negotiate those tricky, self-doubting early months. I began to stand on my own two feet, and build on the strength of my own feelings and desires. A regular play partnership with a friend built up, and this gave me the chance to broaden my horizons – new ideas, private play, outdoor bondage, and some more advanced equipment and locations.

That “have kink, will travel” attitude served me very well for the first three to four years. Armed with my flight case full of cuffs, floggers, sensual toys and a few lengths of rope, I would always find a friend who was willing to use them on me for our mutual yet platonic pleasure and entertainment. It couldn't last forever though, because the unrelenting needs that still simmered deep down extended beyond those hour-long pleasure-rides; there was more for me to fulfil on a deeper and more personal level. These desires, omnipresent from the very beginning, are tricky to put into words, and as before your definitions of those will not match mine. Words like “service”, “love”, “deference” and “submission” have banded about back and forth in my mind without a coherent solution to bind them all together.

It was at that point in my life, the summer of 2007, that Ajay walked into my life. More precisely, I was parked down next to her seat and she was handed my leash. (This is a completely true story.) A couple of further meetings – the key ones in more neutral surroundings – established a desire to experiment with one another. Those experiments increased in frequency, and almost without warning they began to form an ongoing, coherent dynamic. Now, the trappings of control didn't end when the final stroke of the cane fell – there was still a service to be felt, rules to be followed, and expectations to be met. They changed my whole life; I now live to a set of these rules; rules is perhaps an unfitting word to describe them. They are a code for me which has become such an integral part of my day-to-day life such they don't feel like rules anymore, just aspects of my personality, both subtle and omnipresent. I thought being part of this kind of dynamic would entail a sign round my neck in six-foot neon letters telling the world “I am a sub” but it's so much more cerebral than that. But no less complete than I ever dared dream.

Our interests vary from the physical – spanking, caning, kinky and particularly anal sex to name just a few – to the mental – private and verbal humiliation, restrictions on touching my body and what it is clothed with – and another part of this profile will allude to this in much greater detail. I have experienced some of the entries on these lists but still have the large majority to explore. Still larger trials which may shape my future personality are still to be explored fully, which includes as its foremost member an as-yet uncultivated interest in my bisexual side. Not something to be explored in the immediate future though - all enquiries to Ajay on this subject!

To all of these ends, therefore, I am here to talk, share and learn about these things and more besides. I hope you will find me approachable, open, entertaining, polite and respectful, because that is what I always endeavour to be; I'm not perfect, but I'm the best me I can be.

Eye colour: Hazel   Hair colour: Dark brown   Height: 5ft 11in   Weight: 13st 9lb   BMI: 26.4  

This profile was last updated on 12 Oct 09, 10:41 PM.

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