Hello, and welcome to my little corner on Informed Consent, in the form of my personal profile.

I am aphenine. I'm a 27 years old, submissive, single and I live in North London.

About Me

I consider myself transgendered and I'm looking to eventually change my sex (transition). However, at the moment, I look fairly androgynous, I'm not taking any hormones and I'm presenting male, except for the occasional cross dressing where I try and gauge how ready I am to move on. I still find being female too emotionally overwhelming to do much about it in the short term.

I'm single at the moment, and I'm not looking for a relationship right now. This is because I don't know what I want out of a relationship. Part of that uncertainty derives from the fact that I don't rightly know who I am, and therefore what makes me happy or what I want. I want to know, and so I want to experiment and find out by meeting new people and interacting with them. As a young person, I didn't date or flirt with people, and I intend to make up for this with a vengeance now, while I'm still what passes for young. On the other hand, if fate were to hand me the perfect relationship on a platter, I wouldn't say noe. Although I might feel cheated

I'm staggeringly intelligent, in the "there is a fine line between genius and madness" sense, and I haven't always managed to stay on the right side of that line. The same intelligence that makes it so easy for me to dissect complicated problems and find solutions no one else can is the same intelligence that gets me trapped in obsessive loops of thought that anyone with a gram of common sense could avoid and part of the reason I like BDSM is that it's one of the few things that can stop my brain for a while.

I'm not very emotionally mature. I never really exercised that part of my brain as a child and, although I managed to catch up a bit later, I'm still a bit unsure. I did mature as a masculine person, but that didn't work for me and made me very depressed, so now I need to learn to do it as a feminine person. The net result is that I have the emotional maturity of a 14 year old on certain things, and I'm quite shy and easily scared by large groups of people. If I feel threatened, I'll slip into the masculine maturity and use that to cope until I can run away.

BDSM Stuff

I'm a mainly submissive person. I don't like being submissive all the time, as I have an intellect and like to use it, but I do like to be very, very submissive with the right people for short periods of time.

I like any kind of play where life is made simpler through the restriction of choices (e.g. bondage, pet play, pleasing) and/or which reminds me that I'm feminine and not masculine.

I'm mainly female inside my head when I play, so I need to feel protected and safe. Sometimes, however, I'll be masculine when I play and then I go more into the territory of male sub and FemDom. I cannot, annoyingly, tell which it'll be at any time, and this annoys me.

I don't think I'm a masochist, as it contravenes my need to feel protected and safe, but every time I decide that I'm not, my brain decides to surprise me.

Apart from that, I'm a little accomplished at rope bondage (due to lots and lots of practise at self bondage), which means I can critique anyone who ties me. Dead sexy, I know

Finally, otherwise I'm not really sure what I do or do not like. I'm still pretty new to the whole BDSM scene, and I'm fairly sure that I'll be surprised by what I do and do not like.

Non-BDSM Stuff

I generally like and deal with computers lots. I am a self-confessed geek and I can program them, build them, network them and even fix the little buggers when they have computer ailments. You'd be amazed at what can be fixed by a virus scanner and AdAware. I wish humans were that easy.

I also practise Tai Chi. I love reading science fiction and fantasy novels and I like watching Japanese Anime.

My favourite piece of music in the whole world is Songs of Distant Earth by Mike Oldfield and I have Sung in the past.

Eye colour: Green   Hair colour: Brown   Height: 5ft 11in   Weight: 11st 9lb   BMI: 22.6  

This profile was last updated on 15 Mar 10, 10:45 PM.

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