 |
| alexandraa |
Sort by first post . alexandraa's profile
| 17 Apr 04 | Just call me Rolf | (17 Apr 04, 5:12 PM by alexandraa) |
| Well for the last year I have been wanting a very large picture for a big bare wall in the flat, I wanted bright, I wanted colour, I wanted oranges, yellows and reds. I had seen a couple of pictures that would be "Just Right" but they ranged from the horrif-fuck-fic £200 to the frighteningly ridiculous bugger off and beat me stupid £1200. So out of the question obviously. THEN..... duh der daaaaaa. I went to Camden Market last week with a subbie mate and we saw quite a variety of things that would be "OK" rather than "Just Right". But they were still a bastard amount of money. So [more...] | ||
| 15 Apr 04 | Harpy's Nest | (15 Apr 04, 8:57 PM by alexandraa) |
| Got my hair chopped right off today. Gawd knows what M will say when he sees it. Normally I go for written instructions signed in triplicate (in blood obviously) by myself, M and the hairdresser, plus video conferencing between M and my hairdresser, plus extended discussions on cut and colour, BEFORE any sissored approach is made towards my flowing golden locks. However - even though I am of course naturally blonde (except intellectually I hasten to add) my hair had become a harpy's nest of brittle split ends and straggly bits. OK OK due to the copious amounts of bleach that get [more...] | ||
| 5 Apr 04 | Fetishes | (5 Apr 04, 8:44 PM by alexandraa) |
| How fabulous the rich variety of things that turn people on. It never ceases to amaze me. Where do we all get it from? The ideas? The knowledge that the strangest of things can give us an erotic charge? There is i suppose something satisfying and a little scary about popping balloons but i cant imagine i'd get an erotic charge from it. What about custard and jelly too? Splodging they call it. Fancy a bit of that? i had a vanilla boyfriend once that wanted me to make a bath full of jelly up, let it set and then for us to have sex in it. Yeah right, as if, and who'd be the schmuck [more...] | ||
| 30 Mar 04 | The Dom/sub discord? | (30 Mar 04, 8:36 PM by alexandraa) |
| Mad time at work at the moment but its all starting to come together. I am currently reorganising everyone on the second floor of our office so I can sit where I WANT. Bizarrely no-one is arguing just going “oh OK andra”. This power thing could go to my head. Is the world full of submissives or do I exude some "do as you're told or else" attitude that I'm not aware of? Perhaps I should try it on M.... ah well maybe not. Yes M, I can feel THE LOOK from here - sorry….gulp. I think when I'm very very busy, on a roll, I just drag everyone along with my energy. Well whatever the case [more...] | ||
| 28 Mar 04 | Sadism without love? | (28 Mar 04, 1:56 PM by alexandraa) |
| First and foremost, and very most definitely each to their own, for god's sake we all know the horror that some folk feel over the mildest things we might do/submit to. In most of our relationships any part of our play or dynamic might be seen as hard and cruel and abusive. I've had friends, as deeply into BDSM as I, that are horrified by M's ownership of me, my lack of choice in the way we live our lives. I've had scene people scorn me for being a "sex slave". Personally I take that as a compliment. They saw my relationship with M as shallow, they were oh so very very wrong they'd [more...] | ||
| 25 Mar 04 | Fantasy and Reality | (25 Mar 04, 10:45 PM by alexandraa) |
| I would say it all starts with fantasy. It certainly did for me. I dont suppose any of us woke up one morning and thought from this day on I am Dominant/submissive. For me what started as adventures in the land of "Gor" meets "Story of O" has resulted in a deep and meaningful relationship. I think so many people look for the fantasy and forget people are people and you have to have a relationship first and last. Dont get me wrong I happily hold my hand up and say I was in it for the sex mate. I was. Kinky sex give it to me, make it hard, chuck in some pleasurable pain, a handful [more...] | ||
| 24 Mar 04 | Sicker than a sick parrot that's sick | (24 Mar 04, 2:54 PM by alexandraa) |
| Something happened during the night. I know you'll be excited that I'm sharing this with you all. I went to bed right as rain (when is rain ever right?) and woke up at 4am sicker than a whole pack of dogs, a whole flock of parrots (do parrots flock? maybe they herd, or murder - a murder of ravens (is it ravens or crows?) always liked that one) (see how poorly poorly I am). Well anyway I lay in bed with the dismaying knowledge that i was about to throw my guts up. [more...] | ||
| 23 Mar 04 | Busy as a busy bee that's busy | (23 Mar 04, 10:50 PM by alexandraa) |
| M has been incredibly busy of late being year end and all that. Come to that i have been incredibly busy too juggling 3 jobs at the moment. Work is horrific right now 50% of the team have left over the past 4 months and they have only just got round to recruiting due to "restructuring". I'll give them restructuring. Bad management more like. Still things seem on the up and up and from early next week i should just be able to concentrate on the one job which will be a pleasant change, a damn complex job but at least its all more focussed. Blimey that was very vanilla wasn't it? [more...] | ||
| 22 Mar 04 | Switching, krys's blog and vanilla subs | (22 Mar 04, 11:18 PM by alexandraa) |
Hahhahaha Krys you deviant dont be so coy I can
totally see you swaggering about as a Domme..... well
maybe not  But your blog did spark off my memory of
early days with my ex husband - T (T for anything you
choose to think of beginning with T). In the very
very early days of our relationship - before we got
married (obviously you dont have sex once you're
married thank god - see previous blog ) i had as
ever harboured secret desires of bondage and torment.
Having been badgered by T for some time to tell him my
deepest darkest fantasies i decided to risk utter
humiliation and mention [more...]
| ||
| 21 Mar 04 | Interesting weekend & sex weapons | (21 Mar 04, 5:36 PM by alexandraa) |
| I met up with 9 of the girls I used to hang out with when I was at university. Some I hadn't seen for ten years, some for even longer. This was one of our reunions dare I say it – 20 years on…. How is that possible when I'm only 25? I have no idea. I must have been a child prodigy or something. Dont remember being a child prodigy to be fair but also dont remember how i reached the heady age of 40. I was a bit anxious about the inevitable question - So what have you done in the last 10 years? Gulp. Although M had been trying to get me to come up with a less shocking version of [more...] | ||
| 18 Mar 04 | For sale??? Moi???? i think NOT | (18 Mar 04, 9:06 PM by alexandraa) |
I'm up for sale  evil twin tells me she's been
offered 3 fray bentos pies, you meanies cant you throw
a bag of chips in too? Problem is although i'm a
beautifully trained submissive (M's beautifully
trained slave to be exact), gorgeous, sexy, blonde,
blue eyed bombshell of passion, i'm also trained to
mercilessly and painfully kill anyone that touches me
that doesn't have M's permission. So that's a shame
isn't it? More than you bargained for maybe? [more...]
| ||
| 16 Mar 04 | OK i'm calmer now or should i say calmer for now.... | (16 Mar 04, 10:57 PM by alexandraa) |
| Ahhhhh thank you, thank you, thank you for everyone that wrote to give me NEEDLE play (play??? dont make me laugh) advice, some smashing links and their personal views and experiences, fabulous stuff you're a bunch of disgustingly deviant super heros and heroines. I've bombarded M with the said emails, links to sites and all sorts of information in the hope he'll say bugger that for a game of solidiers and go back to sweet things like beating me half to death. OK OK.... all the way to ecstasty and the land of bliss then. Half to death sounded more dramatic somehow. [more...] | ||
| 15 Mar 04 | Major mistake and needle play......... sob | (15 Mar 04, 8:19 PM by alexandraa) |
| So who spotted the major fuck up in my last blog and didn't think to point out to me how stupid i was to write that???? Hmmmm? Speak up, speak up??? HE's only just read it TODAY, any one of you could have mentioned it to me last night. I could have edited it and he never would have known. Sigh.... And i quote, [more...] | ||
| 14 Mar 04 | Limits - a betrayal of trust ? | (14 Mar 04, 8:54 PM by alexandraa) |
| Pull up a chair and get a drink its a bit of a ramble and a rant. It surprised me today to read of someone mentioning limits. I have long forgotten about limits. I have none. I thought limits???? What????? People have limits??? It's so long since I've thought of having a free choice that I was quite stunned to think of saying, "No M, I dont do that - bugger off" (or words to that effect). Let me just qualify free choice - i choose freely to submit to M, joyfully and happily to submit to him in any and every way. End of story. [more...] | ||
| 13 Mar 04 | The hard life of Dominants..... | (13 Mar 04, 4:07 PM by alexandraa) |
| Dont make me laugh..... Read a couple of blogs today talking about what a tough life Dominants have because of all the responsibility and control they have as their BURDEN - ie us lot of feeble minded submissives. Ha! You silly creatures. They love it as much as we love to submit. If it wasn't as fulfilling to THEM as it is to poor ickle us then why the buggery would they love it so much and seek to be stricter and stricter with us?? Hmmmm???? [more...] | ||
| 9 Mar 04 | Mental Torture & Bondage | (9 Mar 04, 5:51 PM by alexandraa) |
| I think there is little that is more deliciously tormenting and tortuous than being pushed to extremes mentally yet having to behave in ways expected or ordered of you. [more...] | ||
| 8 Mar 04 | Managing Expectations | (8 Mar 04, 7:23 PM by alexandraa) |
| Over the weekend i watched a very interesting programme called Status Anxiety, it was talking about loads of us being unhappy about what we have achieved in our lives because modern society encourages us to set our expectations too high. It got me to thinking about a number of things including something my evil twin said lately about things she takes for granted. You know by now i'm in a relationship with a married man and yet i'm happier than i have ever been. How can that be? Its not just that i'm happier emotionally and mentally, but i'm happier in my work, happier in everything [more...] | ||
| 4 Mar 04 | Torturing Barbies & other memories | (4 Mar 04, 5:43 PM by alexandraa) |
| I have to say I laughed and laughed at this blog by Sindie and was stunned to remember I had done the very same thing. Yes, I have to shamefully (how humiliating lol) hold my hand up and say I too tortured my dolls and also my poor defenceless teddy bears and in particular my sisters dolls and soft toys Mwahahahahhahahhaaaaa..... [more...] | ||
| 25 Feb 04 | Freedom in control | (25 Feb 04, 10:55 PM by alexandraa) |
| Well what can I say evilness and sore spots every which way you turn guess M is feeling loads better and like a close friend said i have more stripes than a zebra. Great isn't it? Well I think so and so does he. Yum. [more...] | ||
| 24 Feb 04 | Evilness and sorethroats | (24 Feb 04, 6:24 PM by alexandraa) |
| M had a nasty sore throat all last week which made him feel tired and run down, didn't stop him exhausting me in the bedroom department but is he ever back on form now. Its funny whenever he's ill or tired or upset about something his evilness disappears. He's always strict and in control (and highly sexually charged) but his teasing tormenting evility more or less vanishes. I can tell as soon as I hear his voicethat he's back on form, there's this subtle undertone to it that means - Mwahhahahahhahah am I ever in a wickedly evil mood today and you slave are in for a time of it. Of [more...] | ||
